Designing Relationships

Connect. Deepen. Grow.

Design Here

Schedule your 20-minute complimentary phone session with Sharla here.


Welcome! If you are:
  • A person needing to pull through a challenging time, to increase energy, resilience, clarity, purpose and zest for life.
  • A couple at any stage of relationship-from creating your relationship vision, pre-marital, or undergoing a difficult challenge or transition such as bringing baby home, facing ambivalence, empty-nesting, or retirement.
  • A business with a need to develop effective communication and a strength-based relational model you’ve come to the right place. Life coaching and relationship counseling are for you!

I believe that a quality life starts with quality relationships.
Great relationships begin with compassionate self leadership.
Investing in your life is the best investment you can make.

Together let’s embark upon creating a fuller, richer whole-hearted life and embrace those challenges with strength, humor and creativity. We can design your unique blueprint attuned to your values, hopes and dreams.


I am passionate about helping individuals, couples and organizations design lives of purpose and joy.

Together, we will design your vision, strengthen your belief and confidence and help you achieve success!
I have over 25 years experience working with individuals and couples, and companies in this quest. It is my privilege to assist you in designing your life and relationship with greater purpose and joy.

My Company, Pursuits Coaching was founded to support clients and organizations in actualizing their vision for success. See


How We Heal Our Deep Relational Wounds


“Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in” Leonard Cohen

 How many of us have seen Season 1 and 2 of Big, Little Lies, or read the book? seems to catch on like crazy for a reason.  Of course, the brilliant cast, excellent production of a powerful story of such suspense and complexity is without a doubt. The unfolding and tragic weaving of stories of abuse, violence, and tragedy command our hearts, intrigue, and pain. Each character brings forth such a compelling story. I  believe there are triggers of memory of our own often untold stories that reach deep into our personal narrative. We may not have suffered in the same ways or to the same degree, but certainly including stories of pain, betrayal, brokenness, and regret we all endure contribute to our common humanity. On a relational level, we now have more permission to reveal our stories of shame and vulnerability.

It also connects, thankfully with grit, courage, authenticity, the rising skills that allow love, friendship, justice, humility, compassion, forgiveness, faith, and resilience to win. “Glasshouses” are broken and the light gets in.

Here are a few considerations and steps toward increasing consciousness, recovery, and healing:

“If your heart is broken, make art with the pieces.” Shane Koyczan

Be gentle, brave and compassionate toward yourself. I believe that memories surface because we are ready to take the courage to heal. We don’t need to go digging around for past episodes of hurt. There is enough that surfaces on their own. It’s important to have support to tackle the challenge of awareness and conscious living.

Let it Be- Name the emotion.  It is important to experience the loss, the regret, the impact. We cannot “numb” these emotions without also numbing our joy. (Brene’ Brown) Rather than turning away or turning against ourselves through distraction or addiction- (overworking, eating, drinking, social media ‘ing”, etc) we can turn toward with love, forgiveness, faith, and compassion. (John Gottman)

Speak the unspeakable.

“The truth shall set you free.” (John 8: 31-32)

When feelings and memories occur, we can learn to face them from our own core leadership. If we don’t face them, they will “own” us and carry their toxic power into our relationships in all spheres- at home and at work. It’s that important to dig in and do the work. Bring in your caring and courage to gain resilience and healing over the shadow parts.

Let It Go- I believe that facing our “shadows” requires great courage. So then does the process of letting go. You really don’t want to carry that baggage any longer.

Let It In- Make amends by taking responsibility and seeking forgiveness. Our forgiveness of self and others for pain and regret is a huge step. Rather than BS (blame and shame), we can learn better ways to “stand our sacred ground”, speak the truth and demonstrate authenticity. Rather than pitting ourselves along with gender, racial, economic lines- let’s heal “toxic” patterns and stop the blame game.  “Let in” compassion and forgiveness and let it absorb and stick. Stand for respect, integrity, mutuality, a value of what emotion, heart, diversity, and inclusion bring to the table and high moral ground.

Meryl Streep shares an interview with InStyle, May 29. 2019. On the topic of “toxic masculinity”

“Sometimes, I think we’re hurt. We hurt our boys by calling something toxic masculinity. I do. And I don’t find [that] putting those two words together … because women can be pretty……. toxic,” Streep said. “It’s toxic people. We have our good angles and we have our bad ones. I think the labels are less helpful than what we’re trying to get to, which is communication, direct, between human beings. We’re all on the boat together. We’ve got to make it work.”

“You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it.”  Margaret Thatcher

Focus on what we have in the middle. In these times of great division, caring,    civility, and respect are the core values we have in common.  Celebrate our similarities and allow for our differences.

We are experiencing a loneliness epidemic:

“Three-fourths of Americans experience moderate to high levels of loneliness, said the study, published this week in International Psychogeriatrics. Previous studies found loneliness rates of 17 percent to 57 percent. Men and women were equally affected.”

Choose carefully the people that belong in our “inner circle”. Not everyone belongs in your most precious, trust-worthy, intimate family or friendship space. There is nothing more healing than the connection of kindred souls and the strength of unconditional love- those that stand with you when you “win” and when you fail and fall. Discern the quality, commitment and trust, and nurture and prioritize these most important people in our lives. Seek a therapist and/or a support group. Shame disconnects. Empathy and compassion connect.

“The secret to happiness is freedom… And the secret to freedom is courage.” Thucydides

When we are free from pain, we have greater energy and joy to embrace a deeper sense of meaning, purpose to pay it forward.


Big, Little Lies

Brene’ Brown,

Rick Hanson

Kristen Neff

Meryl Streep

John Gottman

Terry Real




What It Is I Do. Why?


I was introduced to a friend of a neighbor in our new “digs” recently. I was taken with the question, what do you do? I paused and thought upon that question, usually so easy to answer with my usual professional credentials and response. This time,  however, I was truly struck by the existential challenge. I have thought long and hard over the last couple of days and pondered the answer.  What is it I really do and why do I do it?

The answer in and of itself sheds so many layers of complexity, specialization, and ego in order to find the simple kernel of truth.


5 Tips to Design Relationships That Thrive

Click the Button to Receive Your Relationship Pocket Guide to Success!




I’ve had the pleasure of working with Sharla on joint leadership offerings for entrepreneurs at Impact Hub Boulder, and feel lucky to have been part of such a mutual partnership. Sharla is a true visionary when it comes to 21st century leadership and an expert on the skillsets that equip leaders to be their best


I was a member of a Women’s Empowerment Group, facilitated by Sharla Macy. At the time, my personal life was going through some difficult changes and my professional life felt stagnant. Sharla was an ideal facilitator to my group. We all feeling better able to tackle challenges, and life decisions.


We’ve been so lucky at Hygge Power to have received coaching from Sharla Macy She helped us overcome challenges that were otherwise very difficult to handle alone; change management, consistent communication of our vision, and in a non-judgmental manner. Thank you for your tools and guidance.


Sharla  has been a tremendous resource to us a couple. From pre-marital counseling, to the present, she  has helped clarify and implement our vision and life changes. We value the support, insight and expertise this has given to us! Thank you! You changed our lives!


I was searching for direction in my professional life. As my work with Sharla has progressed, I have been continually impressed with how she uses her gifts to connect the right people at the right times and to creatively lead us toward recognizing and implementing our own dreams and talents.



To schedule an appointment please call:

(720) 304-2731

Boulder Office
1200 Pearl Street
Suite 209
Boulder, CO 80302


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